Fort Belvoir, Va. (May 1, 2014) - Fort Belvoir Army Community Service Survivor Outreach Services program members recognized "Gold Star Wives Day" during a luncheon at the Fort Belvoir Officers' Club, April 24.
April 5 was designated as "Gold Star Wives Day" to publicly recognize the sacrifices made by our servicemembers in support of our Nation.
"The purpose of the luncheon was to honor our Fort Belvoir Community Surviving Spouses in recognition of Gold Star Wives Day," said Kelly Burger, Survivor Outreach Services program manager. "We wanted to provide an opportunity for our survivors to come together to honor the service and memory of their fallen loved one and to be recognized for the sacrifice their Families and they have made. We also wanted to continue to foster a sense of community between survivors and maintain a connection to the active duty military."
The Gold Star has officially been recognized as the symbol of loss since 1918, according to www.armymwr.com/goldstar-wives. In 1945, the "Gold Star Wives of America" filed incorporation paperwork that was signed by Eleanor Roosevelt. Less than two years later, Congress approved the design, manufacture and distribution of the Gold Star Lapel Pin to be presented to surviving Family members of those who died in the Second World War.
The opportunity to honor Gold Star Wives and be around other surviving spouses is one reason members like Kim Keller came to the luncheon. Keller was invited by Leslie Alvarez who has been an SOS member since 2008.
"What I have seen with Leslie is an opportunity to interact with people who understand what I have gone through, whether it's recently or you lost your spouse 10 years ago," said Keller. "I wish I had been more involved all along. I wonder would it have made a difference for me when I first lost my husband."
Having the chance to talk to other surviving spouses is an opportunity SOS provided Leslie that helped her get through her grief, said Alvarez. The connection she has made with other surviving spouses, like Keller, is one reason she wanted to attend the luncheon.
"I can call Kim and say, 'Can you come over, please?' And she instantly understands why," said Alvarez. "I don't have to apologize to her for anything I'm feeling because she understands why I feel that way."
The guest speaker for the luncheon was Maggie Osborn, Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors Case Work Advocate. Osborn lost her husband in August of 2012 and spoke at the luncheon to let the spouses know they can still lead productive lives despite the tragic loss they have experienced.
"You went through hell, but you can still find strength through everything you've been through, no matter how you do it," Osborn said. "There's still something you can do that honors your fallen spouse; fallen hero."
Osborn was in Italy when her husband was killed in Afghanistan and she was sent back to the states. So, at age 25, she moved back to Minnesota with her parents.
Osborn had two semesters left in a Masters program for Social Work she was doing through the University of North Dakota, Grand Forks. She completed the program while moving to Washington, D.C.
After interning with Congresswoman Michele Bachmann's office, Osborn was hired by TAPS or Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. She communicates with people on Capitol Hill about the struggles of surviving spouses and the resources they need.
"I see problems, I want to fix them," said Osborn. "It has helped me through my grief because I'm able to help fellow survivors and Family members in our community. We are an elite crowd that no one wants to be a part of, but someone has to speak up for us."
By speaking at the luncheon, Osborn hopes the spouses she addressed are able to take her story and find the strength to move forward.
"You move forward with a situation like this, you never move on," said Osborn. "We still have dreams in life, so why shouldn't we pursue them? Why does everything have to surround this one aspect of grief? Why not turn it into something empowering?"
Moving forward with SOS, and honoring her husband's memory is what Keller wants to do.
"I was telling my current husband last night, I feel bad for widowers in the civilian world because they don't have the support groups the military offers," said Kim. "This seems like a healthy group and I like that they don't feel weighed down by the title of widower. This program is really a godsend to have."
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