FORT CARSON, Colo. -- In the past, Charles Watkins has spent Memorial Day visiting with veterans, speaking to groups about his military service and decorating the graves of the men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice for their country.
The day is important to him.
It's symbolic. But, he fears many Americans have forgotten its meaning and the sobering reminder it carries.
"It's changed from what it used to be," Watkins said, quietly. "It used to be a day to honor and remember the fallen. Now, it's just another three-day holiday for most Americans."
The recipient of the Colorado 2011 Veteran of the Year award, Watkins said it's important for Americans to recognize and remember the servicemembers who gave their lives for the country.
"If we don't stand up for ourselves, we risk oppression from dictators and tyrannical governments," he said. "This country needs a wake-up call."
Vietnam
Watkins never intended to join the military. After completing a semester of college, the Colorado native dropped out in order to earn money to pay for school. Instead, in 1966, he was drafted.
For his tour in Vietnam, Watkins served as a helicopter pilot with the 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment, flying then Col. George Smith Patton IV.
"He was not a traditional commander," Watkins said of Patton. "When we flew, we were down in the fight, not flying thousands of feet above. If there wasn't a fight going on, we went looking for one."
When another pilot flew Patton and got lost, Watkins said Patton made it clear only he would
fly the commander.
"He said, 'Charlie's my pilot,'" Watkins said.
"I flew every single day. The most a pilot could fly was 100 hours per month. I flew between 240 and 260 hours because Patton only wanted one pilot."
Throughout his tour, there were good times and bad.
Watkins said he remembers the day in April 1969 when he and Patton picked up two dying men from the battlefield.
"One of them told Col. Patton, 'Don't let people forget who we are. Don't forget our kids,'" he said. "Combat is a high tempo game. You just do what needs to be done. … You go to your comrades' needs.
"There's a saying that goes, 'We go to war as kids and we come home as men, and only God knows what we went through."
On the homefront
From her home in Colorado Springs, Donna Watkins tracked her husband's movements in Vietnam through television reports.
"The reporters were bird-dogging Col. Patton and following him so I could kind of track Charlie's movements," she said.
When he first arrived in country, Charles Watkins was issued a white helmet that he was supposed to spray paint green. Instead, Donna Watkins said, a friend painted the words, "Chargin' Charlie" on the back of the helmet in red paint.
"I would watch the reports on television, which were already two or three days old, and I would see the vibration of his white helmet in the background with those words so I would see what action he had," she said.
Returning home
When he came back from Vietnam, Charles Watkins said he, like many veterans, did not receive a warm welcome from the community.
"The public didn't appreciate us," he said. "So we crawled into a bottle and started drinking."
He added that he and his comrades drank too much. Some never stopped.
"My buddy, he couldn't come back from all that, and he ended up in a nursing home," he said. "I saw that it wasn't good for me. I knew I couldn't jeopardize my life. I had a wife and two kids to care for."
"It took him quite a while before he started expressing what it was like," Donna Watkins said.
When the two moved to Germany for a new assignment, Donna Watkins said being around other pilots allowed her husband to open up about his experiences. But after a deadly helicopter crash in 1972 during a training exercise, she said her husband retreated back into isolation.
"He changed again," she said. "He was directing the exercise and he felt as the most experienced pilot he should fly with the least experienced. He was reading maps and by the time he felt the aircraft shudder, it was too late."
Reconnecting with the past
After Vietnam, Charles Watkins remained close to Patton, who retired from the military as a major general. When Patton became sick with a form of Parkinson's disease, Charles Watkins continued to visit him. At his funeral in 2004, Watkins delivered one of his eulogies.
"He always said he wanted to die from the last bullet fired during the last war," Charles Watkins said.
Retiring from the military as a lieutenant colonel, Charles Watkins served 23 years in the Army. He said he later reconnected with some of his crewmembers. One of his battle buddies retired to Oregon, another became an attorney. One of his crew chiefs, he said, committed suicide.
"It's a very permanent solution to a short-term problem," he said, looking down. "You touch a lot of different people in a lot of different ways."
Still, he said, there are happy stories.
"At one reunion, this guy saw me and came running up to me. He said, 'You saved my life. I was dying. You pulled me out of a hot (landing zone).' It makes you feel good to know you were there when they needed help."
After 9/11, Charles Watkins said he tried to get back on active duty, but found a different calling as a volunteer at Fort Carson.
"It bothered me seeing all these guys come back and committing suicide," he said. "I wanted to help."
Charles and Donna Watkins attended homecoming ceremonies, greeting every Soldier with a
handshake and a welcome home coin.
"We started doing the coins a few years ago," he said. "We've given out more than 40,000 so far."
Charles Watkins said he also offers rides to any Soldiers that may need a lift after arriving home from war.
"I'll take them wherever they need to go. They should not have to pay to take a taxi," he said. "We didn't get welcomed. They need somebody there to shake their hand and say, 'Well done.'"
Watkins also spends two days each week at the Soldier and Family Assistance Center, helping with odd jobs and talking to Soldiers that need someone to listen.
"So many want to hold it inside, but if you open up and talk to other people, you can get rid of some of those horrors of war," he said. "They trust another veteran. The key thing is talking. It helps them."
Keeping the memories
This Memorial Day, Charles Watkins has no speaking engagements, no reunions. Instead, he says he'll save a quiet moment for the men with whom he served -- the ones who didn't come back, including his co-pilot, Capt. Bert Dacey whose plane was shot down near Cambodia in 1969.
Charles Watkins said he continues to honor the plea of those two dying Soldiers, to never forget. As a member of the Blackhorse Association, he said he and other members of the 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment continue to raise scholarship money for children who have lost a parent in combat.
"When he reconnected with the members of the Blackhorse Association, he began talking more and more," Donna Watkins said. "He discovered he began to feel better about himself."
Charles Watkins said talking about his experiences has helped him navigate through the bad feelings. Now, he tries to help other Soldiers by listening.
Each week he makes time for the Soldiers at the SFAC, helping them wade through the bad times and focus on the good.
He's also committed to welcoming home each man and woman who puts on the uniform and deploys in defense of his country.
"Until we're out completely," he said, "I'll be there. Donna and I will be there."
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