The Fort Cavazos Equal Employment Opportunity Office hosted a professional development seminar May 29 at the Lone Star Conference Center on post to help Soldiers and civilians at the Great Place discover alternate ways to manage conflict.
The training is part of an effort to educate Soldiers and civilians on managing conflict utilizing alternative dispute resolution, explained seminar facilitator and guest speaker Paul Firman, chief of conflict management, dispute resolution education and training at the U.S. Air Force Negotiation Center.
“We worked a joint effort across the Department of Defense to help bring some of these skill sets to people across the entire DOD and the federal government,” Firman explained. “What an incredible opportunity to build curriculum and try to help deliver some of these concepts to people so that we can think about how we are managing conflict and what we could do better.”
In his article, “Conflict Management: And the Air Force Leader,” Firman referenced a study by the Myers-Briggs Assessment and the Thomas-Kilmannn Conflict Instrument that reported U.S. employees spent 2.8 hours per week dealing with conflict, the time equivalent to approximately $359 billion in lost productivity or 385 million lost workdays.
The essay went on to state fear of reprisal and perceived lack of support from the chain of command are reasons incidents often go unreported.
Firman said the goal of the training is to equip leaders with the skills to manage conflict at the lowest possible level to hopefully avoid an EEO complaint.
He shared through the training, he hopes to work on developing lessons that help peers, subordinates and leaders to create and implement a process of resolving disputes with in-depth communication.
Firman noted lack of communication is often at the core of many disputes.
“I see the disconnect in how people communicate. How people hear each other is not about what someone says, but often how what someone is saying is being received,” Firman said. “Our role is to open up lines of communication, where they start to figure out what’s going on below the surface.
“When we start to treat people in a way that changes the art of communication from being a good speaker to being a much better listener, we’re starting to solve some of the trust issues across the DOD,” he concluded.
To get to the foundation of the conflict, trust must be established, Firman asserted.
“No matter what type of problem-solving methodology or conflict management skills you’re using, trust is critical,” he stressed. “If you want to build trust and rapport in your organization, we have to remember that it’s not just what we say as leaders, it’s how what we say lands with the people we’re speaking to.”
As he moved through the audience and engaged with attendees, Firman explained conflict resolution is resolving an issue in a way all parties find acceptable, and healthy negotiation with a mediator, or someone who acts as the go-between to facilitate mutually acceptable agreements, is a vital technique in achieving this goal.
He supported this theory with an exercise involving three volunteers acting as mediator, supervisor and employee resolving a dispute.
He repeated the exercise with different groups to highlight the difference in how each role resolved conflict and to underscore the fact the technique is not one size fits all.
Celis Marie Rivera, Warrior Way Fitness Center manager, shared she felt the training underscored the importance of communication.
“We are always speaking; we don’t have a lot of seminars teaching us how to listen,” she said. “We’re a team so there is always going to be conflict. As a manager, it helps me deal with conflict and better serve and understand my team.”
Firman admitted the methods to managing conflict are just as diverse as the employees, but there are some key aspects he encourages leaders to implement when resolving conflict.
Set the tone
It is important to create an atmosphere conducive to good communication. Leaders should share why they are there and allow the parties to present an opening statement explaining what brought them there as well. The goal is to start proceedings with open dialogue to establish comfort and build trust.
Encourage joint discussion
Encourage parties to speak openly or privately if preferred, and ask probing questions to get information to help facilitate communication. The goal is to make the parties feel comfortable and supported to ascertain the root of the issue.
Utilize negotiation
After leaders have established a mood conducive to civil communication, and the parties have been heard, the goal is to find a resolution all parties are agreeable to and move towards an overall resolution.
Firman noted the concept of negotiation is often lost in the military as following orders is integral to ensuring continuity and safety within the ranks.
“It’s because we got a mission to get done, and, sometimes, the mission actually drives what seems to be so much more important than sometimes dealing with people,” he explained.
But this method isn’t always ideal in the civilian sector as the need for someone to listen is often what is desired most when resolving disputes, Firman expressed.
“When you need an ear, you get a mouth …,” he added. “Become better listeners and truly understand that the art of communication is not what you say, it’s how you try to understand someone else’s perspective before you just simply try to be understood.
“... If we could do a little better of that in the DOD, we would start to reduce some of that conflict,” he said.
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