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Army West Point Esports hosts Gold Star Gamers for three-day adventure, competition

By Eric Bartelt Pointer View Managing EditorOctober 20, 2023

The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
1 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
2 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
3 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
4 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
5 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
6 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
7 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
8 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
9 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
10 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
11 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
12 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
13 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
14 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
15 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
16 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
17 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
18 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
19 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
20 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL
The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the...
21 / 21 Show Caption + Hide Caption – The Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team hosted a three-day trip, Oct. 12-14, at the U.S. Military Academy for the Gold Star Gamers organization to bring children of fallen service members to West Point for an Esports competition, tour of the academy and attend the Army West Point-Troy football game. (Photo Credit: Eric S. Bartelt/PV) VIEW ORIGINAL

The loss of a parent dramatically changes the whole dynamic of a child’s world, underscoring the importance of discovering hope and healing amidst the throes of emotional grief. This transformative period is marked by a confluence of several factors including a huge drop in self-esteem, the onset of separation anxiety, forms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, decreasing academic performance, a loss of friends, and the alarming increase in suicidal thoughts, all while trying to cope and manage a life-altering impact.

In the heart of the military community, the Gold Star Family network is vital in its support, dedicated to both commemorating America’s fallen heroes and providing unwavering support to surviving family members through an array of specialized programs and services. About 15 months ago, the Gold Star Gamers project, a groundbreaking initiative spearheaded by co-founders Martha Laughman and Tom McAndrews, began a mission to “help children who lost a military or veteran parent and help healing through gaming.” Their noble undertaking sought to extend a lifeline to children grappling with the loss of a military or veteran parent, employing the therapeutic potential of gaming as a means of fostering healing and resilience.

“Some people may look at us and surviving military kids, including families of suicide, and think, ‘We’re just playing video games,’ but everything we do has a purpose to it,” Laughman said. “For example, peer support is very important as many of our children don’t know another surviving military child in their community or at their school, so our kids get to play games together, stay in contact with each other and have that peer support.”

Gold Star Gamers connected with the esteemed Army West Point Esports (AWPE) team a few months ago, setting in motion meaningful correspondence that culminated in a momentous three-day excursion to the U.S. Military Academy from Oct. 12-14. Here, the children of fallen service members were treated to a West Point Esports competition, a tour of the academy and attended the Army West Point-Troy football game.

The Gold Star Gamers, which involved four children, were accompanied by two parents and a dedicated member of the organization’s staff, also enjoyed a football spirit luncheon where they were celebrated and recognized, a dinner with the AWPE team, and a spirited Rocket League competition with members of the AWPE Rocket League squad, showcasing both skill and sportsmanship.

The mission of Gold Star Gamers is helping children find hope and healing through competitive gaming. From the organization’s perspective, gaming is more than just play, it is a time to process feelings, connect with others with similar circumstances, have fun and honor the memory of a parent who may have been the child’s favorite gaming partner.

The Gold Star Gamers also includes, among other things, a mentorship program for the children who participate in their programs.

“Our kids tend to feel forgotten or very detached from the military community (after the loss of a military parent), which is very important to them, and it’s how a lot of our kids remember, especially, their fathers,” Laughman said. “They lose their home, they lose their community, and if you think about it, if someone is on active duty in the military now and you may care about your surviving families, but you’re probably not going to call up an 8-year-old to check up on him or her.

“However, we do have mentorship programs where they can play with these kids,” she added. “We ask their active-duty mentors to play video games with our kids as they get paired together with them one-on-one for two hours a week for one year (whether it is in-person or virtual). It’s a beautiful thing because our kids get that military engagement and it’s a way that the military that really cares about our families can engage with them.”

At present, the Gold Star Gamers organization primarily relies on self-funding. Established in 2022, in its relative infancy, the organization is still working on seeking sponsors and partners to bolster its efforts as a non-profit entity.

“We are 100% volunteer driven, so anyone who does donate and visits our website, goldstargamers.org, all of it goes directly to the kids and our programming,” Laughman said.

Laughman said not all of what they do is Esports centric, although the bulk of what they do is online.

“Everything we do is focused on resiliency training, we have mentorship, peer support, we have Esports camps and holiday parties – we do a lot,” Laughman said of the few hundred children involved in a program that can serve the 100,000 children affected by the loss of their military or veteran parent.

Their calendar is brimming with festivities, from a lively Halloween party to a heartwarming Christmas celebration. One remarkable highlight includes sending a child to the Pokémon World Championship Games in Japan, donning a jersey bearing the poignant tribute, “In Honor Of,” emblazoned with his father’s name. The organization also has memorial services, parades and a salute to service that can be achieved through Minecraft.

“We have a new Minecraft world called, ‘Minecraft Tributes,’ and many of our kids were very young when their parent passed and they may not remember the memorial service or know anyone their parents served with, but now they can build a monument in our Minecraft world to their parent and it will be there forever,” Laughman said. “We can invite all the men and women who served with their parent into the server on a particular day and time, and share stories and honor the parent – they’re going to have that digital memory forever.”

This coming year’s Christmas party, the organization saw an astonishing 69 participants registering within a mere five minutes of the event’s opening, and then reaching max capacity in record time.

“Last Christmas, we send all the kids matching pajamas and a cool friend gift box and we play ‘Fall Guys’ for a couple of hours while drinking hot cocoa, tell jokes and have a virtual party together,” said Laughman, who lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado. “Every time a child wins, their family who is registered on Amazon, we send them a gift – they get to earn presents for their surviving parent through playing video games while we honor their parent who passed.

“I had four or five parents last year text me pictures and they were crying saying this was the first gift they received since losing their husband from their child,” she added.

On the organization’s trip to West Point, Laughman was accompanied by her two sons, 12-year-old Maddox and 17-year-old Aiden Nyman-Laughman.

Her late husband, Sgt. 1st Class Matthew Nyman, who served with Delta Force as part of Special Operations Forces, was severely wounded in a helicopter accident that caused head trauma and the loss of both his legs.

“We didn’t really play games before he was injured, but after he was injured, and most wounded warrior families can relate to this, it really is a way for the wounded service member and their children to play together and spend time together – I would say most of their time growing up with their dad was through video games,” Laughman said. “In the end, he ended up getting a brain tumor. We had some hard years. We had to separate.

“Even though he didn’t die in the accident or commit suicide, it was a very fractured relationship,” she added. “Part of my motivation for Gold Star Gamers is to heal that. I want these kids to not remember maybe the worst of their parent at the end but remember who their parent was at their best and know they are their parent’s legacy, and to honor their service and continue that relationship.

“When the kids are focused on playing in their parent’s memory and we honor that relationship, it helps to heal that relationship and carry it on,” Laughman concluded. “That’s really important to me because we want all of our kids to be proud of their parent.”

Visit to West Point

The trip to West Point began a few months ago during the planning stages as one of the Gold Star Gamers advisors, Julian Boddy, contacted Victor Castro, the Army West Point Esports director. From that point forward, Castro took the reins, orchestrating the entire process.

“From step one, (Castro) has been very detailed and he’s made this extremely special for the kids,” Laughman said. “The team at West Point expediated everything and made it super simple, very accommodating. From our perspective, it’s been amazing.”

From Castro’s standpoint, the AWPE team serves as a crucial extension of the academy’s community and outreach initiatives. This aligns seamlessly with the overarching goals set by the West Point superintendent’s lines of effort, emphasizing engagement with local communities and beyond, establishing contact with the Gold Star Gamers organization.

“The biggest thing about us as DOD all across the board is those we’ve lost and paid the ultimate sacrifice,” Castro said. “What gets lost is how the families are surviving from that and what happens (afterward) with how DOD helps them and continues to take care of them. With the Gold Star Gamers, a majority of them are young boys and men, and how do we give back?”

Castro said once he connected with Gold Star Gamers that AWPE immediately began the outreach efforts, met with Laughman and asked, “How can we help?”

In order to facilitate their visit to West Point, Laughman collaborated with her partners to fundraise for travel and lodging in the Hudson Valley. Subsequently, it was a group effort to help accommodate the Gold Star Gamers to ensure their time at the academy were comfortably accommodated over the three-day stay.

“One of our donors here, Laurie Lehman, was able to contribute for the cost of the football game and the cost for the spirit luncheon,” Castro said. “We were able to work within our capabilities at (the Directorate of Cadet Activities) and work within our capabilities within the Simulation Center and Esports to just have our facilities available. Everything else was done by volunteer work both online and communication from email, which was all done at no cost to us.”

On Oct. 12, the first day kicked off with a spirit luncheon at the West Point Club to rev up the community’s anticipation leading up to the Army West Point football team’s game against Troy on Oct. 14. In a college-like atmosphere, the Cadet Spirit Band and the Rabble Rousers got the crowd roaring, creating an electrifying ambiance that resonated throughout.

“The key was getting a chance for them to meet the commandant, getting a chance to meet head coach Jeff Monken, and the standing ovation about acknowledging what a Gold Star Family is and everything like that,” Castro said.

The genuine tear-jerking moment came when Nancy Monken, Jeff’s mom, stood up and gave the group a hug.

“(Nancy) gave all of our kids, all of us at Gold Star Gamers, a hug,” Laughman said. “I don’t know how to explain it, she was so warm and physically embraced all of us. I asked my little one (Maddox) what was his favorite part of day one at West Point, and I thought it would be the coach signing and giving him a helmet or the amazing tour we went on or going shopping at the store, but he said the coach’s mom was his favorite part.

“I cried at the spirit luncheon. Victor asked me if there was something wrong and I’m like, ‘no,’” she added. “Our kids have been through so much in our program that when you see the military, in this case West Point, roll out the red carpet for them and really take them in and show them such a good time, and you see that look of joy on a kid’s face who maybe hasn’t had that look on their face in a long, long time, as a parent, it’s more meaningful than anything.”

Laughman expressed how her oldest son, Aiden, had the most difficult time reconciling everything that happened with his dad. However, he wants to be in the Army like his dad and is also applying to West Point.

“He’s very excited to be here. It’s a whole other level of hope,” Laughman said. “Part of our mission is hope and healing, and all of our surviving families go through a time where they don’t necessarily have hope for the future if they’re in a very dark place after a loss. So, to see my son have goals and have this dream that West Point has opened his eyes to, I’m forever grateful to West Point, Victor and the whole team here.”

But what made the Gold Star Gamers’ visit truly remarkable was the opportunity to replace old, painful memories with new uplifting positive experiences.

“It’s given the kids the chance to gain positive experiences with our military – which is priceless,” Laughman said. “It’s also important that we honor the kids and their service, although they are not military, they have paid a huge price – they have a huge loss in their lives. A part of what we do at Gold Star Gamers is we try to be very child centric and focus on the child, so we’re honoring them. We just want to let West Point know that this weekend has been wonderful.”

Both Laughman and Castro hope to continue this partnership in the future, and Laughman hopes next year she can come back with a bigger group.

“It’s our first time here at West Point, and hopefully we come back next year with a full team,” Laughman said. “When we do a pro rugby trip or other trips, we typically try to have between 12 and 15 kids when we do in-person events, and that is what I hope for with this going forward.”

Laughman said they are always in need of donors, sponsors, partners and volunteers for the program designed for gamers between ages 7-18.

“We are looking for people to play games with the kids. We also need help with everything from admin support, a Discord manager, marketing, so if you name it, we need it,” Laughman said. “We are 100% a volunteer driven non-profit. We have 300 kids we would love to get off of our wait list into our program.”

Castro mentioned that they’re going to need a lot of help as a start-up program.

“Programs like these have to rely on people understanding the mission and understanding that it is exactly what they think it is,” he said. “People should reach out and ask for more information because as they build their footprint … the information is going to get out.

“We worked with five families this time. We were hoping to get it to 10, but subtle growth,” Castro said. “For every year after, it’s going to be a lot smoother (with all the logistics). As we expand though, we hope to go from 10 to 15 … and having a nice little niche of people who are already a family and keeping it in a small, nice group.”

Competition and a Brotherhood

The most exciting day of the trip was the competition day, where the Gold Star Gamer kids competed against AWPE team members in a thrilling Rocket League match held at the West Point Simulation Center.

While these kids are avid participants in a variety of Esports and gaming to include Overwatch, Call of Duty, Smash, Fortnite, this visit was dedicated to playing Rocket League.

The AWPE Rocket League team captain, Class of 2025 Cadet Juan Anariba, was one of the team members who played with the children and got to know them during the visit.

“I got to meet Keegan, Aiden, Maddox and Reece – they all seem to be wonderful people,” Anariba said. “Keegan is interested in electronics and Aiden is interested in coming to the academy. Maddox is an interesting kid as he likes to invest in stocks and those types of things … he’ll be on Wall Street in no time.”

Meeting the Gold Star kids gave Anariba a unique perspective he doesn't typically consider when a service member passes — the profound impact on those left behind.

“I never really thought about the affected when Soldiers have fallen in combat,” Anariba said. “I just think about the people who have fallen in combat and not who was left behind. So, it is interesting to see how they seem pretty resilient in that regards … but it definitively beings it more into perspective for me. I think this definitely helps me in the future.”

Castro added that this is very important for the cadets as this puts an onus on what the cadets are becoming – leaders of character.

“This is big on character. This is something that maybe, personally, they haven’t ever experienced … but ultimately, they may be in a position where there is somebody who is in their formation who they lose, or something happens to that extent and may experience the whole gamut,” said Castro, who is the deputy director of the West Point Simulation Center. “Consider the whole dimension of our cadets … about what’s making them this overall officer. These cadets who had a chance to work with us today … I would argue that it rounded them out just a little bit more.

“Now, they are thinking about their mastery of being an officer and the whole Army in its entirety and this is an aspect of something they may be exposed to,” he added. “As you can see, things are interesting in the world today, so we don’t know what they can be up against next, but they have an appreciation and an empathy that they may not have had before. I can continue to do this now year after year as part of the experience for the cadets toward graduation.”

The experience was a good time for all as the cadets and Gold Star Gamer participants engaged in lively back and forth banter while enjoying Rocket League competition, a vehicular soccer video game. Anariba said it may have been a little harder for them since kids generally play on consoles, offering a different experience than playing on a computer. Nonetheless, the event was an enjoyable experience and provided a welcomed escape, affording the children a brief respite from their everyday realities.

“I just hope they had a great time and had time to just forget about some things they are dealing with in their own lives,” Anariba said. “This was a time to focus on something they like doing, which is playing video games.”

Aiden Nyman-Laughman, who is currently a high school senior, said the trip to West Point was a “great experience” where he enjoyed several aspects of it.

“I really enjoyed the luncheon – good food. I really enjoyed the tour,” Nyman-Laughman said. “I really like the architecture here and seeing everybody going to and from classes and working out. It seems like an overall great campus and everybody’s here for a purpose.”

Nyman-Laughman aspires to follow in his dad’s footsteps, hoping to serve in combat arms, specifically in Special Operations Forces mirroring his father’s distinguished path. He also finds the realm of cyber operations intriguing, drawn to the strategic tactics employed in this field.

Even at his young age, he exhibits a keen military mindset, evident in his preference for playing his favorite video game, Hearts of Iron IV.

“It’s a grand strategy game set in World War II where you control a nation like the UK or Germany or whatnot,” Nyman-Laughman said. “You build an army, you build your economy, you pass certain laws and whatnot. It’s a great game and I play that almost every day.”

Overall, Nyman-Laughman was excited about the experience of being at West Point and spending time talking to the cadets.

“They’re the type of people I want to be around, study with and work with on a daily basis,” he said.

He is currently in the midst of the application process of trying to get into the U.S. Military Academy.

“It’s been a long application process,” Nyman-Laughman said. “It’s so tiring, but also exciting all at the same time.”

However, his chance to get a glimpse at West Point may not have happened without the Gold Star Gamers journey, which has been beneficial to all the kids who are involved with the program.

“I think it’s been beneficial to all of us,” Nyman-Laughman said. “The biggest benefit for me … is not necessarily just the experience (of the trips and events), but it’s just having others around you who have had similar past experiences with a parent dying and not needing to worry about what others think about us. Just having people around you who kind of understand what you’re going through is important to all of us.”

Within that seminal experience of being with others who have walked the same path as them, it has built bonds that will last among these hardened kids and adolescents.

“The camaraderie of it, I think, is just really helpful,” Nyman-Laughman said. “I think a lot of people, especially those who don’t have experience with the military community, just seem to not understand having somebody in their life die at a young age – young age being under 45 – especially while they are also young. Just knowing everyone else here who has had that same experience just helps us easily bond and just click, instead of being judged for it.”

One of the other aspects of the experience from the program is for the adolescents to be a mentor for the younger kids.

“I think it’s just being able to show them, ‘Hey, I have similar experiences to you, I’m older than you and despite all these challenges, everything is turning out OK for me,’” Nyman-Laughman said. “I think being able to show that to young kids is a great thing to do. I think being a young kid, it’s kind of hard to understand that things will turn out OK despite these troubles.”

Nyman-Laughman finds that these experiences serve as a powerful reminder of the positive moments he shared with his dad while gaming, shifting the focus from the challenging circumstances surrounding his father's injuries and illness, which strained certain relationships. Within that scope, he credits his mom for her remarkable role in not only supporting him and his brother, but also impacting the hundreds of kids who are involved with the organization.

“I think for my mom it’s really great to be a part of this organization and help other kids and her own kids,” Nyman-Laughman said. “To help us (kids) heal from the loss of losing a parent and then being able to see the results of all these kids come together, build friendships and be happy together – I think that helps drive her to continue this.”

If you are interested in reading more about the Gold Star Gamers organization and exploring opportunities to partner, donate, sponsor or volunteer in both in-person or virtual gaming events, or other ventures to help kids heal and honor their fallen parent, visit goldstargamers.org.