I see you there, staring out the window. You feel lost; you are missing your friends, your previous home, and just about everything that used to be familiar. You feel alone in this new, strange place.
Your household goods arrived months ago, yet, your house still doesn't feel like a home. You haven't made any friends because you don't see the point, and you can barely navigate to the grocery store because you can't bring yourself to get out and explore. You can't find a job no matter what you apply for.
I hear these statements repeatedly from newcomers. The unfair reputation of the post throughout the military community combined with the isolated location seems to bring those feelings to the surface.
It took me a long time to get out of that rut. For three months I sat in my house watching television, cleaning, and scrolling Facebook for hours on end. I told myself I didn't need or want new friends. I couldn't get a call back for a job to save my life. It was going to be a long two or three years. My only solace was my love for my house on post. I told myself I was happy there, so I avoided going out at all.
My problem was my own thinking. You cannot exist or thrive like that.
Here are a few ways I cured what I call the "PCS Blues:"
I changed my mindset
If you don't change the way you think, you will never see the positives.
If you repeatedly tell yourself this location is awful, it's going to be awful.
I'll be honest -- if a Target within five miles of your home is a requirement for you to be happy, you will be miserable here.
However, if you are willing to adapt and seek out new experiences, you can thrive here. It sounds cliche, but thinking positive can go a long way towards lifting your spirits and opening doors of opportunity.
I left my house
I met people: I socialized, and I made friends. My favorite thing about this duty station is the people. I know you probably don't believe me yet, but just wait, you will see it. The people here are different than anywhere else we have lived. The support I have encountered on Fort Leonard Wood is a notch above the rest.
I went to the park with my kids and met other parents. I struck up conversations with everyone from my neighbors to the cashiers at the shopette. You would not believe the amount of friends I have made on this installation simply by speaking up and introducing myself to random people.
If you don't have children to serve as conversation starters, you can always hike the trails, go kayaking or go to the post thrift shop or dog park. There are endless opportunities for you to interact with people. Check the FMWR Calendar for upcoming events that will fit your lifestyle and schedule.
Friends are out there. You can't survive alone no matter how much you think you can.
I volunteered and got involved with the community
This volunteer position saved me. It was terrifying at first, and sometimes it still is, but it is what finally pulled me out of the lonely hole I was digging -- and what keeps me out of it.
Benefits like friendship, networking, a sense of accomplishment and professional development are some of the greatest benefits to community involvement.
There are countless opportunities to get involved with the Fort Leonard Wood community. You don't have to bake cookies or run the FRG, either. Professional-level volunteer opportunities are available all over post.
If you want to get out of the house and also need to pad your resume, you can create an account at myarmyonesource.com and search and apply for volunteer positions across the post. You can also register at the Red Cross and Army Community Service.
You can do it
If you start with these three steps you will feel much better. Making friends and getting used to the location takes time, but you can't do either sitting on your couch. Get out of the house, and put yourself out there. You never know what amazing opportunities await you.
(Editor's note: Sullivan writes a blog series titled "Show me Fort Leonard Wood," covering various aspects of living on the installation. You can find her blogs at https://showmefortleonardwood.wordpress.com.)
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