Grapevine, Texas -- More than a dozen Soldiers and their families gathered for a weekend of family fun, bonding and skills enrichment here, March 27-29.
Showcasing their dedication to the Soldiers and families they serve, Chap. (Lt. Col.) Paul Andreasen and the 479th Field Artillery Brigade, Division West, ministry team planned the family retreat at the Great Wolf Lodge indoor water park and resort to focus on couples' communication skills, all while providing a much-needed respite from the daily rigors of life.
"At this particular event we're using "The 5 Languages of Love," by Dr. Gary Chapman, which helps couples identify what love language they have been gifted with so they can learn to speak each other's love language and in turn enhance their overall communication skills," said Andreasen.
However, "The 5 Languages of Love" is not the only instruction used during these events.
"We also use many other programs of instruction," said Andreasen. "For our family events we also use 'Couple Communication,' which focuses primarily on communication skills and also a program called 'Active Relationship,' which includes a whole host of modules designed to enhance relationship skills."
Andreasen highlighted one particular program his team uses for their singles events called "How Not to Marry a Jerk."
"Perhaps the most popular singles program we have is called, "How Not to Marry a Jerk," said Andreasen. "The program offers skills and techniques to individual Soldiers to help them side-step marrying somebody they would later regret and how to marry somebody they could live well with."
While identifying each other's love languages was a key point of discovery at the event, the overall goal was to enhance each couples' communications skills.
"If families can walk away from this particular event with enhanced communications skills that they can carry with them through the trials and tribulations of marriage for years and years until death do us part, than that's what I'm looking for," said Andreasen.
For many of the attendees, the weekend served two purposes: providing tools to improve communications within their marriages, and providing much-needed family time.
"Two things I took away from it were the original communications technique that we went over which referenced repeating back to the other person so they really know what you're saying, and also acknowledging that your spouse is not going to change everything that you want them to change, and that's okay," said Capt. David Miller, 1st Battalion, 393rd Infantry Regiment, 479th Field Artillery Brigade.
"It was nice to be able to actually go and do something that we wouldn't normally be able to do," said Miller's wife, Sharla.
"It was also nice to work on our marriage," she added. "Being in an Army marriage, you're constantly apart and then thrown back together, so you have to get used to being apart and then you have to get used to being thrown back together again. It's actually really difficult for a lot of people. You either figure it out or you don't."
Whether a participant enjoyed the opportunity for family bonding or the discovery of their particular language of love, consensus was virtually unanimous -- the Strong Bonds program is extremely important and needs to expand.
"Next to MRT (Master Resiliency Training) it is probably the most efficacious program that the Army has," said Andreasen. "I would like to see it expanded to help more families and help more single Soldiers."
"These are extremely important," echoed Miller. "I just came out of company command and I can't tell you how many marriages were not doing well because of optempo or other stressors the civilian world may not experience in the same way.
"I would actually like to see more of these," added Miller. "Maybe a variation of programs like advanced family or marriage retreats with a slightly different more advanced curriculum."
The chaplain said the Strong Bonds program is a Department of the Army program administered by the Chief of Chaplains Office. He added that the program includes instruction for both single Soldiers and married couples and encourages the spiritual aspect of relationships.
Andreasen estimates that the 479th Field Artillery Brigade's Strong Bonds program has served hundreds of Soldiers and family members since 2008. The 479th ministry team holds four events each year: two for singles and two for families. For more information on your unit's Strong Bonds program, contact your unit chaplain.
Related Links:
"Like Division West on Facebook"
"See Division West photos on Flickr"
Social Sharing