Fort Belvoir, Va. (May 1, 2014) - The Fort Belvoir Army Community Service Survivor Outreach Services Program hosted a viewing of "Gold Star Children," Saturday at the Officers' Club.
Members of the SOS program and three of the member's children gathered to watch the film that documents the connection between Vietnam era Gold Star Children and the current generation of Gold Star Children.
The idea behind having the surviving spouses and children watch the film is to show them they are not alone in their struggle, according to Kelly Burger, Fort Belvoir Army Community Service Survivor Outreach Services Program manager.
"I hope that the Gold Star Families who watched the film left feeling that they are not alone and that there is support," said Burger. "There are Gold Star Families amongst us in our very own community who went through what they have gone through and there is a generation before us that lost their Family members in the Vietnam War that are here to offer support and assistance."
An estimated 5,000 children have lost a parent to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. An estimated 20,000 lost a parent to the Vietnam War.
U.S. Army Garrison Fort Belvoir Command Sgt. Maj. Scott Guillory spoke before the showing of the film and informed the surviving spouses and their children how important they are to the Fort Belvoir Community.
"You are all a part of the Fort Belvoir Family," said Guillory. "It's imperative we maintain a strong connection with our Gold Star Families."
The film centers on Jennifer Denard, who lost her father during the Vietnam War and Cierra Becker, a young girl who lost her father in Afghanistan in 2007.
Film director and producer, Mitty Griffis Mirrer is a Gold Star Child herself. Mirrer lost her father in Vietnam in 1970 hours after her birth. Mirrer and her older sister did not talk about their father's passing during their childhood.
"My older sister was four when our father died," said Mirrer. "I always wondered why there weren't pictures of him in the house and I always wondered, 'What's the big secret?' The big secret was the Vietnam War. There was so much hurt around (the Vietnam War) that Families didn't talk."
It wasn't until Mirrer produced a documentary film in Vietnam in 1997 with her Family that they began to talk about her father. However, a few years later, America suffered the terrorists attacks of September 11, 2001 and Mirrer thought a whole new generation of children were about to go through losing a parent to war.
"As the war went on, I wanted to do something to help the children who have lost parents in Iraq and Afghanistan because we have the same experience," said Mirrer.
Two SOS members brought their children. Leslie Alvarez, Fort Belvoir resident brought her daughter, Grace, 9, and Kim Keller, also a Fort Belvoir resident brought her daughter, Grace, 10, and son Sam, 9.
Alvarez lost her husband in 2004, and Keller lost her husband in 2005. Both wanted their children to know there are other children in the world going through the same experience they are.
"I really wanted them to see that other children do experience this and they aren't alone," said Keller. "We live in a neighborhood full of military children, but even in a crowd of people you can feel isolated if you don't connect with others who have been through what you've been through."
Alvarez and Keller live in the same neighborhood, and are thankful their children have the opportunity to share their stories with one another.
"It's amazing for her to have two children in the neighborhood with her who understand what she's going through," said Alvarez.
One of the differences between the two generations that is addressed in the film is how many Vietnam era Gold Star Children longed to know about their lost parent, while many of the current generation are angry that their parent was taken from them.
The feeling of longing for their father is seen by Keller in her children.
"That's been my concern the whole time. How are they going to know him and who he was?" said Keller. "Even when I was ready to let go of some of his things, I've stored them because that's one of the ways the children will be able to get to know their dad."
Both Alvarez and Keller have made sure they tell their children about their fathers, whether it's through stories from their friends, songs they liked or didn't like or physical features they share.
Both also think it is good their children watched the film with other Gold Star Children
"This is the first time Grace has really interacted with Gold Star children her age," said Alvarez. "It's neat to see them click and play with each other."
Keller added she thinks this experience is just what her children needed.
"You wonder sometimes if you are pushing too hard, or not enough," said Keller. "I think this is just what they needed because I think they are at the age where they need to connect and this was the first step."
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